If you are forced to be your own attorney, here are some tips and concepts you may want to consider:
First, get a support team. Yes, two or three minds are better than one. Do you have any confidantes who can help you through the process?
Evaluate where you are financially. What has the community accumulated in terms of assets and debts? How much do you and the other party earn? Since divorce is the dissolution of a partnership, what has the partnership accumulated in pension, cars, collectibles etc.?
Third, if there are children, how do you share them going forward in a practical manner?
Fourth, how do you move on with your life economically? How will the court likely divide the assets and debts? Consider how much you need to live on and work up a detailed income and expense calculation. You’ll want to know how much support the court will award in child or spousal support.
Fifth, find out how to procedurally go through the court system. Know what paperwork has to be filed to move from the Petition for Dissolution to a Final Judgment of Dissolution.
Keep in mind, you cannot settle a case without thoroughly working up your case. Put as much as possible on paper. When emotions are high it is easy to forget critical facts and figures. So, the sooner you work up your case the sooner you can put a meaningful global settlement together and put it on the table. This helps the other side start to think in terms of settlement rather than litigation.
Consider finding a neutral third party who can help mediate your case. Preferably, a family law-trained professional who can guide both parties to a successful resolution.
